The Land Of No Return.

This is going to be a really weird post,but just go with me on this one because, I am agitated with this. Now I have a lot of clothes. When I say, a lot I do mean a lot of clothes but it seems when I wash my clothes I lose them. I have no idea how but I do and is so irritating to me.

It is not so much my shirts or pants or anything like that comes up missing it is mostly my socks and I can't figure out where they go. I try and do the right thing and wash my clothes everyday. When I wash clothes I always put my things in a basket and bring them over to my wash area and put my socks together so they don't get lost in the washer.Then when the clothes are all done and I go to pull them out I can only find one sock.

Where do they all go? Does my washer eat them or do they go to some weird land that I am not aware of and if that is the case why don't all my socks go there instead of just one of them? I just don't know. I bet I spend at least 100 to 150 dollars on just socks a year and I can't seem to find them. I am starting to think that my wash area is some weird land like the land of no return or something like that.

It is so bad that I have started to were mixed matched socks(which I don't mind). Actually I would prefer to wear mixed matched sock. I just don't have the time or the energy to go through and match up socks. I hate doing that it bugs me like no other when I have to sit there and just match them up.

I never have the time so I just grab the first two socks I see and where them. I eventually find the lost socks but it takes me forever and the funny thing is that when I find them they are never in the wash where they should be they are always in strange place. So one piece of advice for anyone who has trouble with the same thing I do keep,them together so you will not have to were mixed matched ones.

PS: This is what I mean when I say that I have lot of sock but can't find any matches. See I told you this was going to be a weird post.

Money, Money, Money.

Money can buy you a lot of things, and I do mean a lot. It can buy you clothes, and a nice home,and a car, and even trips around the world(which is great,by the way) but one thing money can't buy you is happiness.

Money can't buy you the time that is shared with your family, or the laughs that you share with your family,or a great job, or the happy memories that you and your friends have. No matter how important money is to our everyday lives it's not everything, no matter what we all might think sometimes.True, money can seem like it can make everything better in an instant,but sometimes it just makes it worse.

What I mean, is that sometimes you will be in a situation where you can't worm your way out of it just by using. With me, I have always felt like I would never trade a life time of memories and exciting times with my family for money,not even in a million years. Like I said money can get you a lot of things and is important in everyday life, but it can't buy you happiness.

I think that the way to get true happiness in this crazy world of ours is just to be with the people we love, and not put so much care on money. Just be happy that we have all got the basic things in life like a roof over our heads,and clothes on our backs,and that you are together as a family. It's kind of weird, but I think of everybody who reads my blogs a a big part of my life. And I would not trade any of my life or this blogging world for all the money in the universe. This right here is something that can't be taken away for anything.

PS: The reason that I wrote this blog,was because I was inspired. You know when I first can into this whole blogging world, I did not know what to think. Was it a good thing or a bad thing, honestly I didn't know. Now since I have gotten more into it I simply love it. So I just want to think everyone who visits my blog and reads them. I also really want to think Ruth over at Phooling Around for checking out my blog and the ladies over at The Middle Ages for doing the same thing. Again thank you all so much, this is a place where I can be myself and express who I am as a person so for that I say thanks.

That Permanent Ink.

When I turned 18 one of the things that I told my friends and grandparents that I wanted to do, was to get a tattoo that and donate blood, but that is a different blog. Anyways, I wanted to get a tattoo and I had really been wanting one really bad for reason I don't know why I wanted one but I did for some god for saken reason.

On my 18 birthday I finally got my wish. I had not even though about where I wanted to get in at or what I wanted to get I just knew that it was my day to get one. I had no idea what I wanted. Did I want a picture of one of my favorite animals, or maby a quote, like I said I had no idea what I wanted. I should have probably figured out what I wanted and where I wanted to get it at, before I got to the tattoo shop, but what did I know it was my first one. Finally after over an hour of trying to decide what I wanted, I finally figured it out I was going to get my boyfriends name with a heart.

Now that that was decided all I had to do was figure out where to get it at. Should I get on my back, or my arm, or even on my foot. Finally I figured it out, I was going to get it on the back of my neck. I have no idea why I put it there and why some one did not tell me that it was going to be so pain full.

I did not think that getting a tattoo would hurt so much but it does.It just so happens that my boyfriend got my name and a heart on the back of his neck the same day which made it better,because I wasn't alone and it made it less scary for me. I think that the worst painful part for me was the outline of the tattoo. The coloring for me did not hurt so bad,because by then my neck was numb and I couldn't feel the pain,a little pressure here and there put no pain.Like I said I was really numb. Maby it would not have hurt so much in the first place if I would have gotten it on my foot or arm. Well it is to late for regret now I have already got it and it turned out great and so did my boyfriends.

If I had any advice for people that are thinking about get a tattoo it would be #1- think about what you want to get before you get to the tattoo shop and also where you want to get it,#2-get a tattoo that means something to you. It is going to be your body forever so don't just get one because all your friends have one, #3- make sure you are happy with the tattoo you get. and the #4 rule and the most important- go somewhere that you can see them getting the things out for the tattoo, in other words got to a respectable tattoo shop and also a clean shop. There is nothing worse than a dirty tattoo. That will get you into a whole lot of trouble. As long as you follow these simple rules you should have a good experience with getting a tattoo.


PS: I was trying to get a picture of my tattoo for this blog but could not get a good enough shot for it. But I promise it is a really beautiful tattoo. Well at least I think so.

This Stubborn Girl.

Growing up, I was just as tough as the men in my family. I would always want to do what the men did, and I would tell them that I could do it 10 times better than how they were doing it. I would go out and help my grandfather plant in the garden, and smash tin cans for the recycling box, I would even help mow the grass(which I was not very good at). Lets just say growing up, I was not very girly girl.

Now I am not saying that I dressed up as a boy or anything, I would wear dresses and skirts and I would do some girly things,like play tea party and carry purses, and my favorite shop(which I still do, all the time), but I was just not into the whole pretty pink bows, and things like that, so in a way I guess you could say that I was a bit of a tom boy and I sort of still am, well kind of.

See when I was little for some reason guys in my family just thought they were better than the ladies in my family, and we all know that is not so,right ladies? I mean women can do just as much as men and possible even better. So I believe the reason that I grew up a tom boy is to prove a point and show men that I can do what ever they do, and do it 10 times better.

Now that I am older, I am the same way. I have kind of grew out of my tom boy stage and I am a little more girly girl now, but I still have to show guys sometimes that I an am just as good as they are. See I have told my boyfriend never underestimate me, because I will prove you wrong in a minute.It is kind of funny, when my grandfather met my boyfriend the first thing he told him was "Never underestimate the power of a women" which is just great. He also told him to watch out because I was stubborn and I guess I am, just a little bit, maby.

Anyway, the point that I am try trying to make is that women can do anything that we sit our minds to do. We may not be the best at it,but we can and will do it. Another thing I am trying to tell guys as well,is that you may be stronger but you are not better than women. We just need to all be our self's and not believe that one gender can do something better than the other. We are both equally as smart and it is not a game so why try to compete.

Two Sides To Ever Story.

This morning I woke to the sound of my phone ringing. I got a phone call from a friend who I have been friends with for so many years. When I answered the phone it was her. She was very mad and upset, and for some reason I am the one that people come to when they are upset and mad, which I feel very honored about. She was up set because she had a fight with another friend of hers and she just did not know what to do about it. She was saying that basically her side was right and not her friends. I simply told her that there is two sides to every story and even if she did not want to, she needed to call her friend to try and work things out and listen to her side of things instead of just thinking that her side is the right side. Eventually they worked things out.

There is always two sides to every story. It doesn't matter what the situation may me, there is always another side to everything. That is just a life lesson right there. It was tough to me when I was younger, and it is a piece of information that I will pass on to my kids.

In my friends case, she was just thinking that her side was the only side, when indeed that was not the case at all. When you get into cases like my friend did you have got to listen to the other person's side of the story as well. Not only can that help you figure out a solution to the problem, but that can also help you along the way in life( which I have learned, a lot about).

I believe that the faster people realize that there is two sides to every story the faster it helps people out. You can not always be right all the time, no matter how much we might like to think so sometimes. There is times that we all have to be wrong ,which works out for the best sometimes. So the next time that you are in a tough spot with someone of something, just remember to listen to what the other person has to say, and that there is always another side of the story.

A Helping Hand.

Helping other people is great. It is something that I think everyone should do. There is so many people out there that need help. When you help out it makes you feel like you can want to help out more.

I went to a technical school when I was in high school. I went for cooking. In my culinary class we learned just about everything. One of the things that they made sure they stressed to us was how important it was to help out those in need. Every Christmas we would have this organization call "Dream" come in. Dream is an organized for children that have no parents and are less fortunate. They would come in every year and we would make different kinds of cookies with them and make different presents for all the other children and things like that. Not only did we do that but because we knew that they were not going to have very much for Christmas we would have fund raisers through they year and buy gifts so that each child would have presents and stocking to open Christmas morning. Getting to see the children faces on Christmas eve as we put the presents under the tree was so rewarding and special to me.

Not only have I done that but I also do Big Brother Big Sister which is also so rewarding. It is just a great feeling to help out and know that you are helping out you community. Even if you can help out a little or lend a hand some way to a person in need is great. Some times it's the small things that counts more than the big things.

Go out there and help anyway you can. There are a lot of great charity and organizations out there that need our help. We can help them one at a time and feel great while doing it.

PS: I did this post because helping out is what I like to do and I am very passionate about it. It is something that I feel very confident about....

Words Like No Other.

When I was growing up I always got told a quote that applies to ever one, and my grandparents said it to me all the time. The quote was "You Can Be Any Thing You Want To Be". It many not seem like such a great quote to some people, but to me It is the greatest quote in the world. It helped me when I was in grade school and It is helping me now.

It's kind of weird how when we are little we don't really pay attention to what are parents and grandparents say, but then 20 years later we realize what they said back then can help you in your everyday life and be so special.

When I was little, I would tell my family I wanted to be so many things when I grew up. I told them that I wanted to be anything from a nurse, to a doctor, to a dancer and I actually took dance lessons for 4 years then I decided that I did not want to be a dancer so quite dancing and every time my grandparents would tell me " you can be anything that you want to be". It took me the longest time to figure out what I wanted to be. I tried so many different things and it took me really into high school to figure out what I wanted to take up.

I have always had a love of art, so I am trying to learn more about art as well as my other subjects in college. I just believe that you may not be able to figure out what you want to do with your life when you are younger and it may take you a little while to decide what you want to do, but when you figure it out, just run with it. Take it as far as you can take it and soar with it and don't let anybody stand in your way, from your dreams.

The Great Beyond.

Have you ever just sat out side and looked up at the clouds, and stars at night? I love to do that. When I am looking up at the sky I always just think of it like a piece of art. Actually in a way it almost is. It is just so beautiful and can take away any stress that you may have had for that day.

When I was little I use to lay on the grass and look up and try to make different shapes and objects with the clouds. It was fun to just look up and see what I could see. I still like to do that to this day. Except now I like to go out when it's night time and look up at the star's and try to find different groups of stars,like the Big Dipper and the Little Dipper and different cluster like that. When I look up and see the clouds It just really calms me down and makes me think about different things that I have going on in my life and also makes me appreciate my life that much more.

Like I said I don't know what it is about the clouds and star's that are so calming to me, but it is. I have always been fascinated with them. Even when I was in school I took astronomy that way I could know more about the stars. To me it's almost like reading a good book and not wanting to put it down because it is so good. When I look up at the clouds and sky it is the same thing, I don't want to ever stop look up because it seems to me when I look up I can see past the stars and it all just seems so good to me.

So here is my advice( I know, I got a lot of advice, but just go with me on this one.) When you have the time or have had a bad day or even just for fun go outside and look up. See what you can see. Make it a family thing and enjoy each other's time together. Who know you might be surprise about what all you think about and see. So give it a try, and see what you see.

The Hour Glass Figure.

Today I was inspired to do this post for many reasons. The real reason that I want to do this post is because, today I was watching tv when I seen a show come on and it was talking about how you should look and dress for your body type. This show really got me thinking. It got me thinking about how we all come in different shapes and sizes.

There is no such thing as the perfect body, even know that some people may think differently .We should be proud of who we are. We have all heard the words fat, or thick or skinny. I hate how those words. To me it is like someone is holding those words over our heads, just because of what we look like.

We all come in different shapes and sizes, and we should be proud of who we are as people and not worry about what size or shape we are. This world is focused on shape. Think about it. When I turn on my tv I always see shows like, "America's Next Top Model" or "Celebrity Fit Club" or different shows like that. It is shows like that make people's self confidence go down. Not everybody can or will ever have the same body type or size so why even worry and think about it 24/7. I am not saying that you should be un healthy and not exercise and not stay in shape. I mean I work out every day, but I am not afraid to say that even with me working out for at lease 4 hours everyday at my gym, I don't have the perfect shape. Let's just put it this way I am here to say that I am not a size 0 nor would I want to be.

I don't think that men worry about this as much as women do. I mean I know that men also like to say in shape, but if they put on a little extra weight or lose their figure they don't freak about it. Ladies we tend to care a little more about it. I have done it too. When I would gain a few pounds I would freak out because I was afraid that I would lose my figure. With all these shows about weight and people on tv saying what shape you should be it is hard not to be concerned about it.

I just feel like everybody should be happy with who they are and not be so worried with what we look like all the time. Not everybody is going to have that hour glass figure. So just be happy. Don't ever try to be someone that you are not. If you are not an hour glass figure so what.

We got enough in this world to worry about without having to worry about how big or small we are. So just be true to your self, and be happy with your body. I know that I am. And don't listen to what other people say about your body. The only thing that matters is that you are happy with yourself and that you have confidence in yourself.

The Crazy Product World.

There are so many new and exciting products out now days. Actually, you basically have a product to help you with everything. You have products out now that help you with getting dressed, or with cooking or talking on you cell phone, or even with your pets, ect. So I have been asking my self, Is our world really getting that lazy?

Think about it, with these new inventions all around us, all we really have to do is just sit and let the inventions take care of it the rest . I really hope that we are not getting this lazy, because if we are than this world has got a lot to worry about. It's just like the other day, I got this book in the mail. Yeah you know the ones I am specking of. The ones that are just filled with crap and useless junk that really no ones needs. Anyways, I was looking in one of those books when I came across an invention that just made me giggle. It was basically a stick to help people put their shoes on. It just made me laugh so hard, because I am sitting there thinking,"WOW, what has the world come to now days if people can't even put on their on shoes".

My second question is, where in the world do people come up with these silly things? I mean do these inventors just sit at home and think to them self's" I think that I am going to make something today that just makes people more lazy".

Why do we have to have all these new things? I mean, why can't we just do things the old fashion way like we use to. Now, please don't get me wrong, I am not saying that every new invention is bad. I have seen some things that would be good to have, but come one do we really need things like"The Potty Patch" for you animals to go potty in your house. Come on now, I mean really, here's an idea take your animal out side to go potty. I just feel like we really do not need all these things. Instead we need to go back, to doing things the old fashion way. We don't need to change all these things in life.

We don't need a lazy world, really we don't. What we need is a world that is filled with people that have a lot energy and are full of life. If we keep making up these silly inventions, than we are all going to become lazy. So I have one thing to say to these inventors" STOP Making These Things, No body wants them". Maby it's just me that feels this way. I hope not.

If I Could Turn Back Time.

Have you ever wished that you could turn back time. Well, I know I have, and that's what Im wishing now. I wish that I could go back and fix my matake's in life or turn back time so I could go back and do the things that I should have done when I was younger but was to afraid to do.

Lately I have been feeling like I have been missing out on life. I feel like there are just so many things that I should have done and just haven't done. They are just simple things, like giving my great grand parents one last hug before they passed on, or going on vacations with my friends, or even getting close to people because I am afraid they will all go away and a forget about me. It's just simple things like that. Now, I know that I can't really turn back time but, it would be so cool if I could. If I could turn back time, I would say good bye to my great grandparents that I did not get to say good bye too, I would also fix some problems that I had at my previous job, also I would try to figure out why in this world I am so afraid to get near people, and fix that so that I can be near people without being afraid that they will run.

I know that at people might think that you can't turn back time so why even write about it, but to me these are just things that I have always wanted to chance. Maby if I could turn back time and change these things,in my life than my life would be different. In what way I am not sure, maby I could get a little closer that I fixed these things and have more confidence in my life, what ever the reason my be it would just feel good to me and I would not have to feel like I missed out.

I had a friend say to me that we all have things that we want to go back and change in life, but since that isn't possible why dread on it. Why think bad about yourself, she told me,and that it only brings your self confidence down and that those things are in the past so leave it there. She also said "Why try to change the past, why not live in the future. I had not though of it that way. Why am I trying to change the past when I can't,right? I think that I am going to take her advice, and try not to change the past and instead try to live in the future and live it right and make up for my mistakes. That is all anybody can do right?

My Cry Pets.

OK so this is going to sound a little weird but just go with it. I have many pets like I have said in many of my post. They are all very special to me and I love them all . They are just all so beautiful and full of spirt. I have cats and 2 dogs. I have a couple of cats that I have grown up with. They just understand me and I understand them. Because I don't have children of my own, they almost act like my children. They have always been a part of my family, and always will be.

It is just like this one cat that I have. I always called him my cry kitty. The reason I call him my cry kitty is because,every time I get upset or I start to cry he always comes up on my lap, and just stay's there.In a way he is kind of like a dog or at least he acts like it sometimes. I have had him for a while and I really just think that we understand each other. Now it is not like he talks or anything,but he can tell when I need him to come up on my lap and lay there.

I have two dogs as well and they are the same way. The difference between him and my cats are that the dogs know as soon as I come through the door if I have had a bad. It is like they can sense it. Maby they can , who know really. Every time I have a bad day and start to tear up they always come up on my lap and start to give me kisses. That always helps me when I have had a bad day.

I guess what I am trying to get at,is that, animals are great creatures. They are god's gift to us and we to be thankful for them. I know that my pets may not be able to talk,but I know they can sense when I need them,and I can tell when they need me. It's almost like people, once you live with someone or and animal for so long they become part of you. They become part of your family. Like I said, maby I sound crazy, and who knows maby I am in a way, but I just think that your pets can tell how you are feeling and sense when you need them. I am so glad that I have my pets I don't know what I would do without them. I love my babies and I always will, each and every one of them. So be thankful for the time that you have with your pets,and spend as much time with them as possible with them.

PS: These are some of my kittens when they were born, I have a few more but they don't like there pictures being taken.

PS: Also the white cat up top is the one I call my cry kitty. His name is Twiches. He is the one I usually cry on if my dogs are playing in the house somewhere.

Table Talk.

You have seen those commercials on tv. The ones that talks about spending as much time as possible with your family around the kitchen table. Well I know that I have seen them.I use to think they were kind of dumb. I use to say to my self "that will not help you become closer as a family, just by sitting around the kitchen table." I was younger, so I really didn't thank much of spending time with my grandparents. Actually a lot of times they would be in one room eating and I would be in another. Now when I am home, we all sit around the dinning room table and discuss our day and feelings with each other.I may not have appreciated the family dinners when I was younger but I sure do now. I am very thankful that I can sit with them and tell them my feeling and share my stories.

Now, I know there are some nights that family's just can not have dinner together either because, they are to busy or because they are in a couple of different place at once,but as long as you have dinner at a least a couple times a week together then that is all that matters. Family dinners can be so important. They can be the place where you share stories and memories with each other. It is a time where you can share what you have done that day as well as your feeling for that day.

Now I love family time. I just love the fact that I am so close to my grandparents. Just like today we we all went to a restaurant and talked about the things that were on our minds. We shared memories and laughed like crazy. I love that. Being near your family is so important. Take that time to just sit down and talk to your family.

Like I said, I know that there are times that everybody just can not be in the same place at once,but you should try to get together as often as possible. Family time can be a great time as long as you let it be. Not only do you get to spend time with your family,but you also grow closer. Maby when you are younger you think it is pointless to sit around the table,but when you grow older you start to think about how important it is. Life goes by in an instant, so take the time while you have got it to spend time with your family. I promise you will not regret it.

The Gift Of No Return.

Have you every gotten that you really wanted or that meant a lot to you? I know I have. One of the gifts that I got this year for my 20th birthday meant a lot to me. The gift did not mean a lot to me because it was expensive or because of how big or small it was. It meant a lot to me because of the person that gave it to me and that it came from the heart.

Now I have gotten a lot of gifts over the year. Things that my family has gotten for me or has put together for me, like a memory album or a dvd of our life together but this year the one thing that I got for my birthday was a coin book. Now I know that sounds a little weird,but it was special to me. The reason that it was so special,was because first of all is because my grandfather gave it to me, and I have said many times that both him and my grandmother are just so special to me. The second reason that it was so special to me is because, my grandfather had been collecting those coins since I was really little. See he is the kind of person that will collect a lot of different things and will save them till people get older and the give them to different people. My whole life he has always collected different coins and different kinds of money .That is his thing you know. So on my 20th birthday he gave me a book filled with these different coins and different pieces of money in it. Like I said maby people think this is weird but to me it wasn't.

This is something that he had been collecting since I was little very little. This is something that I can look back on and think wow my grandfather made this for me. This is a present that I can never return and would never want to return. I love this book of coins and it means the world to me because my grandfather gave it to me. He even has more coins that has collected over the years. So I will have plenty more coin books to come after this. This gift didn't come from the store,but from his heart.

The thing that I am trying to tell people is that, the special things in life's doesn't come from the store but from the heart. It comes from people that means the most to you. This is one of the best gifts that I could have gotten, and I will never forget where it came from.

Sleep,Sleep And More Sleep.

Remember when you were a kid and you would get up really early, and you would go into your parents room and wake up them up as well, Then you all would get up and go down stairs and watch tv. Well that how I am today,minus the waking of the parents since, I don't live with them anymore. When I was little I use to get up at like 5 or 6 in the morning. I just could not sleep,what so ever. I wasn't having any bad dreams I just could not sleep.

When I was a teenage like 14 or 15 I would stay up to 10 0r 11 and go to bed. For some weird reason it just seemed like I was more tired as a teenager. Maby it was because when I was a teenager I had a job,and school, and some home work,and I had things to do. By the end of the night I just felt dead and I would go into my room and watch tv and end up falling asleep on my bed with the tv on (which happened often). My parents would always get after me because I had left the tv on. They didn't like when I did that very often,but what can I say I was tired.

Now I am back to when I was little again. I just can not go to bed. I stay up to 2 or 3 and there are nights that I have stayed up till it was 5 in the morning. I don't know why I do that. Maby it is because I am in college and I just am under a lot of stress sometimes. I wish that I could fall asleep at a normal hour. I just am more alive in the night time. Most of the time I am on my computer,Or watching old movies with my boyfriend. I don't know what it is,like I said I wish I could just figure out why I can't sleep. I never can tell when it comes to me , sometimes my life is just kinda weird, in a good way not a bad way.

This is a good song,plus this is the way that I feel about sleep. For a country song this is a good song and it relates to my blog, check it and and see what I mean. Plus: the guy is kinda cute,but don't tell my boyfriend I said that.

Home Sweet Home.

Home, that is such a great a word. It's a word that means so many different things and has so many different meanings. It could mean a place where you live (which it usually means) or it could be a place where you were born. For me it means a place that I can come back to when I come back from a trip or college. I love my home it is so great. It is such a great feeling to me when I am away and I come back from a trip and I get to relax in my house. It's kinda weird now,because when I was younger I never really appreciated my home, I just though it was a place that I went to after school. Now I finally really appreciate it. Now I know what it really means to me and how great it can be

Allow me to explain just a little more. I just got back from a trip to the beach. I love the beach like I have said many times in many of my post. It was a wonderful trip. We had so much fun. We stayed for the weekend and it was just amazing,(and when I say we I mean my boyfriend and I). We went to the beach and swam out in the ocean. We body boarded(or at least I tried),we swam and laughed like crazy. Then we went to sit in the sand at night and had lunch on a blanket, and then we watched the fire works, which were amazing and he held me close and it was just the most amazing feeling to me, ever. Then we went dancing after the beach and went back to the hotel and went to bed. To say the least it was amazing. So it's not that I did not have a good time,but it was just a long trip. It felt like we had been away from the house forever and today I am in a little bit of pain because I got sun burned and it really hurts. I get burnt so easy.

I was just so happy to be home with my pets and just get back into the normal everyday routine. Sometimes when you go away you forget about the normal routine of life. When you go home it's kinda hard to get back into that everyday life style. It is just good to be back, and relax in my home, and be out of the hot hot weather. It was such an amazing trip and I do miss the water there,but I am glad to be back to work and back in Canada with my family,and friends. Now all I can say is "Home Sweet Home" (AND THANK GOD FOR IT).

Facing Your Fears.

Have you ever had a fear of something? It could be anything. There are a lot of fears to chose from. Well I have had a fear of a couple of things. My fears are things that a lot are afraid of. When I was little I had a fear of the dark. I hated the dark. For me it was the scariest thing on earth. Now I am not afraid of it anymore. I just faced my fears. One night I just turned out all the light and I went to bed,well tried to go to bed. About half way through the night I told my parents that I was afraid of the dark and that I wanted a night light . And they told me that I needed to face my fears and to try to sleep with out a night light. Before I went back into my room that night they told me that it was the same as Moring time and that the sun would be up in the Moring. I knew that I had to face my fears so I went back into my room and just went to bed. Now I am no longer afraid of the dark.

I know it sounds kinda weird, being afraid of the dark. Like I said I was little what did I know. Now that I have grown up I don't have as many fears. Now don't get me wrong I am not telling you that I don't have a fear of things but it is simple things. One of the things that I do have a fear of that I have always had a fear of is heights. I hate heights. I just feel like when I am up high look down or on something that is high up in the air I am going to fall. A lot of people have a fear of heights but I feel like my aversion to highs is so much worse. Mying is so bad I don't even like to get up high on a ladder. I know again it sounds weird, but that is just me. I know that sooner or later I need to face my fears but I just don''t know if I will be able to handle being up somewhere high. That to me is so much worse that being afraid of the dark.

I need to just take a big step and face my fears head on. I need to get this height fear out of my way. If I could just get this fear out of my way I could do so much more. I could go see scenery that I was to scared to see because it was a height . I don't know how I am going to face my fear yet but I need to do it. I need to do it for myself. I want to prove to myself and everybody that I can face my fears and if I can do it they can too. I think fears are just all in our heads. Maby we are not afraid of anything, we just think we are . Like I said if you have a fear you should just face it head on. That is the only way that you are ever going to get over it.

The Look That Killed The 90's.

I grew up in the 90's, back then it was blue jean dresses,and well just a lot of blue jean clothes. I wore little blue jean jumpers and pretty little pink shirts, and of course I had my hair in pig tails with bangs. Yeah to say the least I was a little weird. That was the 90's though so what can you expect.Now I am not saying that there was anything wrong with the 90's, but the looks that were back then you know would not cut it now.

The styles were just so different back then,sometimes I just don't get the trends. I really don't. Is it just me or is it other people too that just don't get fashion? Maby I should explain. Like I was telling you when I was growing up in the 90's it was a lot of blue jean skirts and even blue jean dresses, they had those tight pants, you know the ones that I am talking about, the ones that came down and were so tight around the ankles. The ones that made you feel like they were hugging your ankles. Those are the ones I am talking about,and yes I had many pairs of them,and would wear them to school,proudly. I was little what did I know. Now,what is weird to me is that some of those styles are back into fashion. Now I am not talking about the piggy tails, or those dreaded blue jean dresses,but things like those skinny jeans, the ones that hug your ankles, seem to be back into style.

I thought they would go when the 90's went out, and they did for a while, but it seems now that some of the styles that were back in the 90's are coming back in . I am not sure why they are coming back in,but they are. Now with me if a trend goes out,I just don't wear it anymore,but now that some of those trends from the 90's are back I am starting to wear them again. Like the skinny pants and the blue jean skirts. If you really think about it ladies, those kind of jeans can be really cute if you match them up with a cute pair of heels and a shirt,well maby that is just me. Anyways, I guess what I am trying to get across is this, fashion and trends were different back then and they have come along away since then,but some of those trends are coming back and are staying for good this time. You can never tell, fashion is crazy now days .

PS:This video shows what some people would wear back in the 90's. It shows some of the styles I was talking about in my blog.This is a show that I use to watch back in the 90's everyday called Saved By The Bell. Enjoy and look at the styles and see what I am talking about.

The Packing Worries.

Have you ever packed for a trip and just thought to yourself that you are going to forget to bring something or forget that you are going to do something for the trip.Well that is how I am today. Like I told you all in a previous post, I am going to the beach with my boyfriend. We are leaving one day earlier than my family than they are coming the next day, to spend time with us. I am very excited for the trip and excited to spend time with him and my family,but I just have a feeling that I am forgetting to either do something for the trip or that I am forgetting to pack something for the trip.

I hate that I have this feeling.I wish I could figure out what it is that I am forgetting ,but for the life of me I can't figure out what it is. Did I forget to pack extra clothes,no brought them,or maby it was that I forget to book the hotel, no can't be that, I did that yesterday,so what is it? Maby it could be that I am forgetting to do something around the house before I go,no can't be that either, I have done everything that needs to be done. Man I wish I could figure out what it is. I hope it is noting important or big. I don't think that it is anything horrible that I am forgetting,probably something small. I have packed,packed a second time, and re-packed, I am packing right now as I write this blog. I just like to make sure that I am not forgetting anything. With me it doesn't matter how many times I re-pack I still end up forgetting something.

I don't know why in this world I think twice about the things I have packed. I am always thinking twice about things,and packing is no exception's. Why do I do that? I don't thing that I am the only one that does though. I am sure that there is other people in the world that thinks twice about things,and especially about packing. I can't be the only one,can I? I hope not,really I do. I don't want to be the only worry wart. Well maby it is really nothing that I am forgetting . Maby I am just so worried about this vacation , that I just think that I just think I forgot something. Who know with my mind I never know. It is hard to tell with me. Hopefully it is nothing.

The Next Step.

Every girl dreams about getting married someday. We all want that special diamond ring,the one that really counts. Well I have been wanting to get married for a long time. I think that my family has had that special day planned out since I was little. I feel like it is taking forever for my boyfriend to ask me to marry him. He knows that I would say yes in a heart beat, I would not even have to think about. We both love each, and we both want to get married, but I think something is standing in his way of asking me to marry him. I really wish that I knew what it was. Is it me,or is it that we are both still in school,what is it?

We have always talked about finishing school, before we got married. We both want to get out there a little bit more with out careers. We really don't want to rush anything,but he has not even ask me to marry him yet. We could just be engaged, we could wait till we got out of college to get married since that is what we both want. Now I know that I sound a little un patient,but you can't blame be. Like I said I have been planning my wedding since I was little. Now maby some things has changed like the colors and the songs and different things like that but I have always known what type of wedding that I have wanted which is beach wedding. I want a wedding down by the water,with everyone bare footed,and the sun just going down. That would be so beautiful and perfect. I have talked to my boyfriend a couple of times this week about getting engaged and it seems like every time I do he just says"ok honey we will". I wish he would just go ahead and propose to me, really. I will wait however long it takes ,because I do love him,but I just wish I had some kind of clue that is going to happen, and happen soon.

Like I said maby I should just give him time. I think it will happen, and I know it will happen soon I just need to be patient. My grandmother and grandfather is always telling me to not rush things. They want to me have the best life there is out there. They are always telling me two things, 1:)don't rush your life away,and 2:) When things are meant to happen they are meant to happen, and only then will things fall into place. I know it is true and I should listen to them, It is just so hard to though when you have been dating someone since middle school. Like I said I love him to death,and maby these things take time who knows. For me I just hope we can last a long time like my great grandparents did that I talked about in my last blog. Now it's all just waiting it out to see what happens.