Learning Never Stops.

It's weird to me. This crazy world and all it's about. From what we learn about life to what we learn in life and what we learn about our self's.

See,I have always though that I knew everything about myself and what I was all about . I mean how could I not know everything about my self right. WRONG. It has took me a while to figure this out but I think I have finally figured out who I am in life and everything about my life . Now don't get me wrong I am sure that there is so much more that I am missing about myself but right now I know more about myself than I did when I was younger.

My whole life I feel like my I have been on a quest to find out where life is going to take me and to try and figure out what I am all about. Of course I know my name and such but now I know so much more. Now I think I have found in which I have been searching for.

Now, I know what kind of person I am instead of what kind of person I want to be . Now I know that I can be so much more than what I think I can be,which is what my grandparents and friends have been telling me my whole life. I know now that I am so much more in life that what I ever wanted to be .

SO,if you ask me who I am or to describe myself I would say: I am young women trying to make it in life,I am a very deep,kindhearted person who cares about her friends and family and who loves to help people.I know that now I want to help people in life which is what I do in my job and love doing it. I am a very simple and quite person .

Again, I still have more to figure out but for now I think it's a good start. So if you had to describe your self what would you say. I am challenging everyone to do this and really see if you know your selves as well as you think you might.

Nervouse Nelly.

I'm back and ready to write,so here we go. This week has been crazy from work to now getting ready to go to the beach. Yes,that's right I am going to the beach in November. I know that's a little weird for me to take a vacation in November and to the beach is even more strange of me but let me explain.

I am not going to the beach by my self. In fact I am going to the beach with my church to hear a great speaker. Now,my thing is I kind of have a fear of this. No,not going to the beach or anything just being with that many people 24/7.

I don't know why am so nervous. I totally trust these people and think of them as family because they are all my age and I have known them for a while now so why am I just so nervous about going?

Don't get me wrong. I love to be around people. I really do love people and love to have people near me but not all the time especially at night. At night I am very much just a me person,which means I like to be by myself and just chill at night. At night my cell phone,I pod ,and tv goes off and I am by myself with no one around. So when I go on this beach trip I am going to have someone around me all the time which Yes spooks me.

I know it kind of sounds dumb and weird but I can't help it. I have been like this for so long. It sounds so dumb to be nervous about being around people but I am . Anyways the second week in November I will be writing from the beach so it should be great.

Busy Day, Busy Nights.

Ok, todays post is going to be kind of short but oh well it's a post,but I promise I will be back towmorry with a longer post.

Work latley has just bee crazy. I work basially everyday and I get busy we all do sometimes. With me it seem like latley I have been busy day in and day out. I feel like work has caught up with me and you know what,I am just tired. I really truly am. I need a vaction,who else is with me on this on?

It's not that my job is even that hard. It's the fact that I work all the time. No,really all the time. 7 days a week 50 hrs a week. Anyways,I told you all this is just my tired post. Towmorry will be so much better. I promise you on this one. Ok,Im going to bed anyways have a good night everyone.

Direct Me Not.

Ok,so I have to admit that I do not know directions to save my life. Of course I know my left from my right and things like that,I just don't know street names or at least I can't remember them.

If any of you have ever read my blog, you will see that I forget . A LOT. I will forget to put in words where they need to be,or forget what I am talking about things like that,anyways you get the point I forget things so it's only natural that I forget names or streets and sometimes just for a second where I am going. It's like when I get in my car to go somewhere my brain goes out the window and my mind empties which is not always a bad thing if you think about it for a second.

People ask me all the time where certain things are or they will ask me the name of a certain streets and I have to be honest with them and tell them " that I have no idea". Then once I do tell them that I have no idea I get it followed by the evil glare followed by the strange look on their faces,like I should know where places are. I am not an information booth so I really don't know.

It's not my fault that I don't know places or things are all the time. I forget, I am human and us humans do tend to forget sometimes. Give you it's some more than others but yes we all forget sometimes.

The only way that I can tell you where things are at or street names is by tell you what they are close too. And yes I know that this bad memory of mying is not a good sign for the future so that's why I am going to make the best out of my memory now why I still can.

So all in all we all forget it happens. The thing that I always tell people is that if you do not like the way I give directions then you have to choices. Number one: you can find it yourself. or number two: you can take the directions that I gave you and be happy with them. Remember I'm not an information booth so if you don't want the directions I give you here is a piece of advice don't ask.

Faster Than A Speeding Bullet

You ever feel like the days and weeks have just vanished. I have and today especially It has been one of the days where I feel like it has just vanished. Disappeared right in front of my eyes. I don't know where the days goes anymore or the weeks for that matter.

It's funny in a way to me. Before I got my job that I have now, I use to sit and wish that the days and weeks would go by faster just so I would not have to deal with them. Now I look at days and weeks and wish that they would slow down just so I could catch up with them.

I feel like I have missed so much in life. Maby not family things or important events, I just mean life and all it's beauty that's in it. It seems now that when I want everything to just slow down they speed up,then POOF there gone.

My Grandfather always said when I was growing up " Don't rush life because if you do,then it's like a fast moving train and it will never slow down or stop". I never thought much about what he said till now. Today for some odd reason I have been thinking about it a lot. It's like it's stuck in my mind now.

So,I believe that I am going to take his advice and just slow down. In this world I feel like if you take life to fast then it will go to fast and you miss out on so much. Remember,you can't turn back time we can just make the future slower.

It's Time For A Change.

I think it's time for another change. Lately I feel like I have been headed in this weird direction that life wants to take me,and honestly I think it might be a good idea.

Since I am on my own now,and have a great career on my hands maby it is time for another change in my life. Who knows maby it's nothing major that I am going to change or maby it is,what ever it is I am sure that It will be so great to see.

I think we all get like this sometimes or at least once in our lives,where we feel like we are just ready for that next step in life,and that next big move. It's kind of great feeling knowing that you have so much more in life than what we see right now.

I know in my life there is so much more up the road,and although I would never rush life,I just can't wait to see what is waiting for me,weather that would be getting married(which I hope very soon for),or a family or what whatever it may be it will be great.

Honestly I do not ever know what I am just now having these thoughts now,I think since I moved out and graduated college and got my very own place, it's only fitting that I think about something like this.

Well, who knows all I know is there is a great world out there,with room to grow and be free and express ourselves and it's only a matter to something changes.

My Night In The Stars.

I think I have said before, I love looking up at the stars. I can't help it,it's like a drug for me. I'm guilty, arrest me. For me the stars are just another way of escaping this crazy but yet amazing world when I need it.

I remember when I was little, my friends and I would go out in my back yard and lay a blanket out on the grass and just watch the stars. We would always try and make shapes with the starts . When we looked up and seen the stars, we would see all kinds of shapes and sizes.That's one good thing about the stars. When you are younger they can be so much excitement. Well at least for me they were.

Even now I am crazy about them. In fact when I have day where I have things on my mind or if I just need a quite place to write, I sit under the starts and just gaze at them.

I know it sounds weird,and for a lot of people it is but I can't help that I am obsessed with the stares. They are so beautiful and just amazing.

I had friend ask me one time " Why do you like the stars so much,they are just a bunch of little dots,and it's not like it's an amazing piece of art work or something"? Which I came back with " Yes they are art work, If you would take the time to look at them then you would know,and second keep your opinion to your self".

Stars are great, sometimes I think people don't take the time to just sit for a second and look up at them. I am not saying that you have to adore them like I do,but just look at them,even if it's just for a few seconds.

Stop The World.

Anyone who know me, knows that I just love my job and love to work . Work for me has always been a way for me to kinda of escape if that makes any sense at all. I know that it sounds weird but it really is kinda of an escape, maby that just show that I love my job but who knows.

Although I love my work and family and friends and things around me there are often times where I feel like I am just worn down and need to tell the world to stop for a second while I catch my breath. I hope I am not the only one who feels like this,I don't honestly think that I am. I think that there are many times where we all need to just tell the world to just STOP for a second.

I guess with work and everything going on around me it would be nice to have some time where I could just catch up with the world and with myself. Now please don't get me wrong,I have a wonderful life,and it's full of amazing things and amazing people but I just feel like I am worn down.

Wouldn't it be great,if we could tell the world to just stop for a second and to hold on. I wouldn't want to it to stop forever, just for a second. Long enough for me to just take a breath and go back to real life. I have thought about this for a long time,and always wanted to do a post about it,and I figured today was the day to do it. Thanks for anyone who reads this and to any one that follows me.

Organize Me Not.

Everyone that meets me, knows that I am a very very organized person. I have to admit that it's true that Yes I am an organized neat freak. I love it and just can't help it.

Everything in my home has a special place. Every thing that I get I tend to organize. I have a sense of accomplishment when I get to organize something. With my mind it's better that I organize things instead of just leaving them everywhere that way I know where they are at.

Not only am I just an organizing freak person but I try to make other people organize as well. It's just like this weekend when I was on vacation. I was sharing my room with a friend of mying which I don't mind at all until I found out that there were just so messy. They had clothes on the floor,and things out of place and it was just driving me crazy. To make a long story short I told her she needed to be more organized and she got mad and now we will never ever share a room together again.

I'm not saying that my home is so perfect it's amazing, I'm just saying that when I do organize that it makes it a lot more better on myself for when I go to find things.

I honestly thing because I was not organized in college that,that is the reason why I am so organized and clean in my home now. I wouldn't do it any other way.

The Birthday Crowd.

September is coming up fast,then after that it's October which means in my family and group of friends the birthdays start rolling in which is never a bad thing.

I love to help celebrate birthdays and I especially love to help plan them and in September and October I get to do that a lot

. It starts of with one of my best friends birthdays,she will be 22 I think, then It goes to my other half's birthday who I love very much, he will be turning 22 as well. Then my grandfathers is in October and my grandmothers so as you can see it I am booked for the next two mounts.

Birthdays are always special for me,so if I can make them special for someone else then I have done my job. When we have a birthday around my family then my family comes in from all over just to celebrate it. And of coarse I have to come in to be their.So I am bringing it on and can't wait for September. It should be a blast .

Looking Around The Circle Of Life.

Today's post might not be the happiest post but it's something that I have to get off my chest. So sorry for the weird post.

The past couple of weeks has just been weird,scare and just upsetting. It's been one of the weeks where I would just want to climb under a rock and stay there because I have honestly not a clue what to do about it. One of the things that has really been upsetting me is when people tell me that they want to rush life.

I bet I have had someone every week for the past couple of weeks tell me that they wish time would fly by. The only thing that I say to them is " No you don't". That's the only thing that I can say to them.

I am just so tired of people saying that. What I can't understand is why people rush life when life is just so precious and beautiful. Sure it's not all fun and games but that's no reason to rush things.

I hear so many people especially older people and people that are sick say that they wish they could go back in time and just live life more than they already have. So why if you hear that why would you not want to just live life.

I don't know,maby I am just old fashion but I make sure that when I am in life that I take it one step at a time and piece by piece. There are so many people that wish they could go back and just do things that they never got to do or always wanted to do,and never get to do.

Like I said,not a very happy post I know but I needed to get this off my chest. If I can just give anyone out there one piece of advice it's please don't rush life and instead look at like a puzzle and do it one piece at a time.

Mirror Talk.

Physically,Mentally,and Spiritually, I know who I am BUT, when I look in the mirror I still wounder sometimes who the girl is looking back at me.

We all have those times where we look in the Mirror and still wounder if there is something more. Maby something a little deeper than what we see and know. Don't get me wrong I do know who I am,it's just that I find myself sometimes wounder what more is out there for me.

Life in it's self has token me so far,more than I could have ever ask or dreamed of when I was growing up. Now that I am in my adult years I still wounder if what I see is really what I am or should I be doing something more with my life.

Although I am sure when I grow a little more there will be something more fantastic than what I already have, I still wounder what that will be.

I figure life is like a quest, you go on it looking for the ultimate prize but on the way you find some great things,BUT once you get to the ultimate prize it was worth all the hard work you put In to it.

A Lesson Well Learned.

I have always been one of those kinds of people where I was able to make friends fairly easy. True, I didn't always get along with all my friends all the time,but then again who does.

If you read my blog,you know that YES I have wrote about this and still do write about this subject quite a bit. Today again I am going to write about not only judging people but also about making friends. Say with me on this one, as it may be a little confusing.

The other day for my job, I had to out of town. I had to go to a convection center to work,with my co worker and also many other people. While I was working there I came across a lady that was probably in her late 40 early 50's . As she come over to talk to my co worker I simply turned my head to tell her HELLO to her. When she did not answer me I just let it go. After she left I told my co worker that I thought she was rude and a little weird because she just could not stop shaking. After I told my co worker that I got a response that I did not expect which was that the lady was not rude she was having a bad day and she had a disease where she could not help that she was shaking.

After she told me that I just felt horrible. I mean who was I to talk bad and to judge this women when I know how it feels to be judged. I just felt like I was just the most horrible person in the world. In fact I felt so bad that after I stopped feeling sorry for my self, I went right over to the women and her husband and introduced my self and apologised to her.

In the end the lady forgave me for judging her and we sat and talked for for hours. Now, that lady didn't have to forgive me, but she did. And for that I most thankful for. Believe it or not I don't normally judge people. I guess in the time that I spent judging this women I really could have been Friends with her. In the end it all worked out for the better for both of us if you really think about it. I learned an important lesson about judging and making friends and she got out of her bad day and started having a great day.

If I could give any advice through all of this post,it would be don't judge some one on what they look like or how the look like, and if you make a mistake make sure you make it right.

When Fashion Rules The World.

Have you ever thought about today's fashion and how it basically rules the world? Think about if for a second. Have you ever picked up a magazine,or turned on the television, or even talked to someone and had them say something about what you are wearing?

I think we all have seen or heard something like this. Fashion is all over this crazy world. It comes in many different shapes,and styles and almost everyone in this world just seems to be addicted it.

Let me start of by saying that yes, I do like to look good. We all do,but NO I am not obsessed with fashion. Never have been,and never will be. In today's world we put way too much on how someone looks,or what they are wearing. I mean who can help that we put a lot on fashion. It's all over the magazines and on the television,so it's only natural that we put a lot on how we look and what we wear. But should what we wear take over our lives?

The answer to that question is no we should not let fashion rule the world. With me, I wear what I like to wear. It may not be the thing that is IN this season but I like it and it's fine with me. No one else how to wear it and it's what I like so no one should say anything about it.

I really think that if we all put more on what we are wearing and just try to be ourselves and not someone else with what we are wearing than this fashion world would not be ourselves. SO do yourself a favor and instead of trying to wear the thing that is IN try wearing something that is you and no one else.And besides it doesn't matter what you wear or how you look it matters what on the inside that counts.

I THINK MY MIND HAS GONE ON VACTION.

Ok,so I believe that my brain has gone on vacation. Not that my brain has always been in but it's just that over the years my brain and me have had well lets just say issues.

Ok, so let me explain. Usually, I have a pretty good memory. I mean I do forget sometimes but who doesn't ,but now it seems like I am forgetting at the weirdest and most awkward times. I hate when I do that,and I hate when I can't remember things.

It seems that the only time that I ever forget things is when I really need them the most. Of coarse that is when it always happens. So, I am starting to think that my brain is on vacation,or maby it's on some weird planet that I am not aware of.

Another thing that my brain does is makes me forget where I put things. I can have something in my hands,put it down and forget where I laid it. It's like me and my brain don't get alone. I have just a bad memory and I am only 21,this is not a good sign for when I am like 50 or worse even 60.

LIKE A FISH IN THE WATER.

Anyone that knows me or that has even talked to me know that I just live to swim. I love to swim and it's a big passion of mying and always has been.

Knowing now that I love to swim, I wasn't always this way. In fact, when I was a bit younger I actually was scared of the water and did not want to go in at all. I would always ask my parents not to let me go in the water because I was too afraid of the dangers that I would face when in fact there were no dangers at all just great memories. When we were swimming my parents always made me go in because the were teaching me how NOT to be afraid of the water and after time I finally was not afraid to go in the water by my self.

Now, I feel like a fish in the water so free and able to swim about, and love every minute of it. When I am in the water I feel like I have no care in the world,and not a thought in sight which is great.

Maby it's just me being my crazy self, but the water is like magic for me. It's one of those things where I look back and actually Thank my parents for making me do. If not for them making me get in the water when I did not want to then I would still not know the wonders which awaited me.

One of the best things that I ever did was face one of my fears head on. Being free in the water is just great I love it. That's why I just love the Summer and all it's beauty and warmth.

BEHIND THE MAKEUP MASK.

Ok,so YES you guessed it I am so not big on make up. Never have been,and Never will be.

Now I can't say that I never EVER wear any but I just don't use a ton. For me I have one of those looks where I can go natural and still be pretty with out using a bunch of things on my face.

I have seen those women on tv,or in magazines a lot of those women look like they just have so much make up on. Everyone has seen these kinds of people it's those women who you can tell have a lot of makeup on because you can seen that little line right on there face. I just can't let that be me.

I don't mind looking a little made over but not a lot of make up on me. It looks to weird. I think it should be someones choice weather they want to wear make up or if they don't.

No one should be forced to wear it. Some people are just very naturally pretty and for me I guess that I just am. So if you wear makeup I just want to say I am not judging you. I am just saying that a lot or make up is not for me.

NIGHT OWL,DAY OWL.

It's now twelve at night and yes I am still awake. I am waiting for my eyes and my head to let me go to sleep. See, I am so awake in the night. I am very much a night person and always have been and always will be.

I have never been a morning person AT ALL. Even in college when I had classes it took everything I had to pull myself up in the mornings. I'm not sure why, but I always feel more relaxed in the night time, I feel like I am on top of the world at night and no one can stop me.


I really just do not like the mornings. I have a hard time when I get up for work now. Now because I have gotten a little older,now I always have to pull myself up and make sure I have coffee in me because if not I can not function in the mornings.


Maby I really am a night owl,in a day time owls world. Maby that's just what I am. But at least I know I am not alone on this one. We all are either a day time or a night time owl,we just got to figure out which one we really are.

THE LITTLE VOICES FROM WITH IN.

We all have those little voice from with in tell us what is right and what is wrong. However this is one thing that I have struggled with doing this week. It's not that I forget to listen to what my heart tells me to do,it's that sometimes I choose the wrong thing instead of the bad way.

This weeks has kind of been a struggle with in my self. This week I have had to go through a lot and a lot has happened some good and some bad.The good things I don't have to worry about it's the bad things I have had to really had to think about. With everything that has been going on, I have had to decide how to handle them. Sometimes I don't handle things the best way because as I had said I don't like to get in fights with people.

See,I have always been told to handle bad times the way my heart tells me to handle them. Sometimes I forget that, as we all do sometimes. I think there are just times when we all deal with things in a bad way not meaning too of coarse. It's something that we all do it's only human sometimes.

What I need to remember how to do is how to think with my heart and listen to my heart .I do struggle with that,but it's something that I am not alone on because I know everyone does this some time or another. So my lesson for today would be, when you are in a tough spot listen to your heart and do what it tells you to do.
(PS:These are some of my favorite lyrics that go along with what I am talking about.

"I've had choices
Since the day that I was born
There were voices
That told me right from wrong
If I had listened
No I wouldn't be here today
Living and dying
With the choices I made"

A DAY TO CELEBRATE.

OK, time has come and I am finally 21. Boy has it seemed to take forever. That's right it means on June 12th I was born 21 years ago. With cake and ice cream and and family and friends all around me it was time to celebrate and I could honestly not have ask for anything better than what I had.

I am a very simple person. On my birthday I really don't like to have anything to big but this year I decided to do not only one thing but two. First thing that I got to do was to have all my family gather with me and have a nice family dinner. The second thing that I got to do was go out with my friends.

Ok, I do have to admit that I did indeed have a few drinks. Now, I am not bragging so please don't miss interpret me,but yes I did have a few drinks and to tell you the truth they weren't horrible.

See for me it's kind of funny. Everyone keep asking me the whole day on my birthday if I had felt any different in age wise. And to answer EVERY ONES question the answer would be NO I don't feel any different from now that I am 21 to when I was 20. I feel just the same.

I think the reason it's so funny that everyone keep asking me that question is because if you think of it at least for me,when I was little and turned a differet age I always felt different because I was becoming a big girl and able to have more responsibilities. Now that I am 21 I just feel the same as when I did when I was 20.

So to get the point across of what I was saying, yes I really and truly had a great birthday,but no I don't feel any different.